After looking over my high-school era stories, I came to the realization that few of them are any good. In fact, they’re horrible. For that reason I have decided to skip ahead a bit to one of the good ones. This story was, like the play below, written in a quick burst. I began on June 29th, 2008 at 03:00 a.m. and finished fifty minutes later. I then went to sleep.
“Parvum, P.I.: The Yak Files”
The phone rang. A hand reflexively turned on the lamp, followed by a displeased groan. According to the alarm clock it was 9:15 p.m., far past our hero’s bedtime. After rubbing his eyes he picked up the phone.
“‘Ello,” he croaked.
“Is this Parvum?” a panicked woman gasped. He jerked the receiver away from his ear, a soiled expression on his tired face.
A note before we begin: These works are presented unedited from when they were finished. This one was written in Spring of 2006
A short playe naméd The Winter of Discontent Turned Summer by a Great Dragon Spewing Fire Everywhere
Personæ Dramatis and people of the playe:
Baroness Jennifer Fetterman, liegeman of Londinium
David Liggett, said to be the boyfriend of Jennifer
Franco Oberes, High Jumper and Runner
Young José, imported slave
Principal Emilio Fernandez, Sage
Act I Scene I
Baroness Jennifer Fetterman was borne in London, England under the reign of Emperor Arthur MacArthur in the era of Kingdomcome. Beholdeth and behest, a great neesing leviathan torment’d the city of London. Many men tried as they may to kill the great monstre, yea, but succeeded not. Save one man, the great knight Sir Crapsalot, dar’d with great valor and an extra toothbrush to seek out this monster and put a stop to his nefarious agonite. Now it came to pass that the squire of Sir Crapsalot was a squirrelish boy naméd Franco Oberes. This young beefy boy could jump higher than a house (although so can I; have you ever seen a house jump?) and beheld the ability to run alongside a horse. In fact, he did. Sir Crapsalot held no part in sharing his horse with a squire. Now it came to pass that in that day of discontent entreated Emperor MacArthur his son and Baroness Fetterman to a feast in the court.
Some debates go on for far too long.
With something complex like an economic issue or picking out sexy summer-wear, the length of argument can be frustrating, but when the debate is something that can be solved in minutes with the ever-elusive “logic” and “scientific reasoning,” an argument’s refusal to be resolved can be downright irritating. At this point in the paragraph, you’re probably thinking “Just get to the point already!” Well, if you insist. The issue of which I speak is the long-going topic of abortion. I know, you want the argument to end too, right? I bet you don’t even want to read this article anymore. But fear not, for I assure you I’ll make it well worth your while. Throughout the article, I will refer to supporters of abortion as simply “proponents” for brevity’s sake. So what do the proponents say to support abortion? The most common point they make is that an embryo is not alive. Rather than wax philosophic about that indescribable quality that makes us alive (or does it?), let’s look at the characteristics found in every living organism to test this opinion.
2016/11/01: Added a “Store” page where you can buy paperback or Kindle copies of articles from Cake’s Corner. Please help me out! The support is much appreciated!
2016/08/03: Greatly updated and expanded Recommended Reading page.
2016/07/19: Organized posts in better chronological order. Activated custom domain; changed URL to cakescorner.me
Welcome to my blog. As you read this I am currently working on ways to boost traffic to this site. I have already added “Free” to the beginning of the original title, “Computer Viruses.” It seems to have worked at least moderately, judging by your presence. Man, marketing is hard! Anyway, I will be maintaining several pages here, so look forward to its growth. If all goes well, I will rise to the top, just like the garbage in Lake Michigan cream. Look forward to more as the days go on.
All content ©2011-2016 John Everett. All rights reserved except where otherwise noted.